It is often difficult to start thinking about rebuilding the intimacy between you and your husband after an affair has taken place. There is too much pain to wade through to even take a look at the possibility. TripTogether.com While it may be very hard to think about having a physical relationship with your husband again, there are small steps that you can take to move forward towards this in the future.
Intimacy can be broken down into
three different sections. The first one would be romance, the second would be a
connection that is emotional and the third would be sex. If making love to your
partner is not in the books right now, you may want to consider building up the
two other sides to make it more approachable.
Romance
Romance is important for both
spouses and it is just as valuable for a man to experience as it is for a
woman. In any marriage it is quite often the first thing that has been swept
aside. Intimacy is hard to produce if there is no romance, since it helps keep
a connection alive between two partners. This is the first area that should be
worked on.
If you have never considered
yourself to be romantic, here are a few ideas to get you started. Try holding
hands while you RussianBrides are
watching TV, send flowers or send a card that just lets the other know that you
are thinking about them. This is quite enough to get started and romantic ideas
can grow from this seed.
The emotional connection
There must be an emotional
connection firmly in place to have an intimacy. Without it, the relationship
will be lacking to a point where sex and romance cannot thrive. Both spouses
need to nurture each other in special ways emotionally so that a deep
connection can occur.
The best way to get this connection
started again is to begin talking to one another with the goal of understanding
each other's wants and needs. Start the conversation by discussing your dreams VictoriaHearts.com and goals and see where that
leads. You may also want to talk about pleasant stories from the past. These
are an easy icebreaker and can lead to many more thoughtful discussions.
Intimacy
Sex is only one side of the
equation when it comes to intimacy. To be intimate a couple does not have to
engage in sex. They can share themselves deeply through conversation, light
physical contact, using romantic gestures or simply spending quality time
together.
There is a lot of confusion about
intimacy since it is often considered to be the sex act itself. This could not
be further from the truth. If you consider a couple where one is handicapped
and the other isn't, a lifelong intimate connection can still be made without
the need for sex. Some of these special marriages will last a lifetime even
though the sex component may be lacking.
This does not mean, however, that
sex does not play an important role in a relationship. It simply means that sex
alone does not equal intimacy and it is possible to be intimate with a partner
without having sex.
If you are still recovering from
the effects of your husband's affair, it may be time to start building up some
intimacy without making love. You can start by rebuilding your emotional
connection and romance and see what type of path that leads you on. You may
feel more comfortable about having sex again with your husband once the other
two parts of intimacy have grown stronger.
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